Yay! I finished a book. It seems I do that so infrequently lately, but yesterday during nap time I managed to finish Joanna Brooks' The Book of Mormon Girl. I want to pick out a few specific points about the book that really touched me, but first, I'd like to write a little bit about how I first came across Joanna Brooks.
About two years ago, I finished my first Women and Gender Studies class. I had just found out I was pregnant and knew that after my graduation, I would become a full time parent. To keep my feminism alive and going, I decided to start this blog (Happy Birthday on the 17th). I needed some extra information if I was going to take this on, however. I mean, how many feminist Mormons could there be? That's when Google led me to Ask Mormon Girl, Joanna Brooks' website where she answers questions like Dear Abby for Mormon progressives. When I read her posts and responses to many questions I had myself, I felt so... hopeful. Maybe I could be a good church member and still be me.
Then I bought her book, The Book of Mormon Girl. And it was amazing. So much so that instead of writing a short review that discusses again and again how wonderful I thought it was, I am going to pull some quotes that I particularly enjoyed. This does not summarize the book in any way because the post would go on for days. These are simply my favorite take-aways.
About two years ago, I finished my first Women and Gender Studies class. I had just found out I was pregnant and knew that after my graduation, I would become a full time parent. To keep my feminism alive and going, I decided to start this blog (Happy Birthday on the 17th). I needed some extra information if I was going to take this on, however. I mean, how many feminist Mormons could there be? That's when Google led me to Ask Mormon Girl, Joanna Brooks' website where she answers questions like Dear Abby for Mormon progressives. When I read her posts and responses to many questions I had myself, I felt so... hopeful. Maybe I could be a good church member and still be me.
"'You'll be fine,' Sister Bryson would say, sensing my fear that I had done it all wrong, read wrong, thought wrong, loved wrong, married wrong, lost my way. 'You'll be fine,' she would say, resting her hand on mine, 'because you are searching for truth, and truth is what matters.'"
Since converting, I have heard it from both sides of the fence why I am wrong. Why I am in trouble. On the non-Mormon front I am told I am letting this church dictate my life. I am letting them tell me what I can and can't do, who I can and can't be. On the Mormon side I am told I lack faith enough, love for my Savior enough. I am told I lack knowledge and understanding. There is often been little peace from either side. As a convert, I felt, and sometimes still feel, that I do not have a spiritual home- religious, yes, but spiritual, no. The loving words that Sister Bryson imparts, "You'll be fine...because you are searching for truth..." are the ultimate encouragement. You're not a failed Saint.
"It is not a doughnut.
It is not a rose.
It is not a plank of wood.
It is not a bus without brakes.
It is not a pearl on a golden chain, nor is it a millstone.
It is neither a fragile treasure nor a heavy burden.
It is nothing that can be damaged, lost, or given away.
It is not an it.
You, your body, your self-you are not an object lesson.
You are an ancient spirit in a young body. You will make choices."
In the chapter leading up to this, Joanna Brooks recounts many of the object lessons taught to her as a youth. My favorite was the one about the white rose. She and her fellow Young Women passed around a white rose, smelling and touching it. After everyone had a turn, the leader explained that everyone would prefer a new, fresh rose to the wilted one everyone had handled. And thus it was also with your virginity. I love that Joanna Brooks addresses the object lesson. Life is so much more fluid and dimensional than a simple object lesson. It is also a lot more personal. From the gospel I was taught, you are never ruined with the atonement of Christ. Rather, we learn from our mistakes and continue on trying to be better selves.
"I hold my tongue, but I also hold my seat. This is a church inhabited by people willing to give up their own children for being gay. This is also the church of Millie Watts and the church of my grandmothers. This is a church of tenderness and arrogance, of sparking differences and human failings. There is no unmixing the two."
This gives me courage to stay seated in my classes when the point has gone awry. I have heard from many people that a problem they see is that the lesson strays from Christ, and I agree. When this happens- when we begin discussing wars and politics and superfluous thoughts that are not even tangential to Christ, I want to leave. Not leave the room, leave the building. In the first sentence, this quote reminds me not to be bullied (not by people and not by ideas). Keep my seat. I belong here, too. There is good and bad and we take it together.
"I don't want to blame anyone. I want to do what my ancestors did: look west and dream up a new country for my children... I want a faith as welcoming as a Pioneer Day dinner table set with a thousand cream-of-chicken-soup casseroles and wedding-present Crock-Pots, a table with room enough for everyone: male and female, black and white, gay and straight, perfect and imperfect, orthodox or unorthodox, Mormon, Jew, or gentile."
This final quote pulls out a Mormonism that I envision. The wonderful things when Mormons come together with love and celebration (which is absolutely overflowing at celebrations). The wonderful values seen in families. The service when there are people in need. Combine these with acceptance and room for everyone at the table. Without judgment. After all, isn't that what our Maker is for?
This book gave me hope. It made me feel like I still belong, unorthodox and all. As far as a book review, I would recommend this to anyone who has grown up in the LDS church, anyone who has ever had a faith crisis, anyone who is grasping or clinging to a religion that felt like home. Five stars.
4 comments:
This reminds me of a beautiful song that Jessie Clark Funk sings titled "please, come"
Oh the days when I drew lines around my faith
To keep you out, to keep you in, to keep it safe.
Oh the sense of my own self entitlement.
To say whose wrong, who don't belong, who cannot stay.
Cuz somebody somewhere decided we'd be better off to fight it. BUT somehow despite the damage done, He says COME.
There is ROOM enough for all of us.
PLEASE COME, and the arms are open wide enough.
Please come.
And the parts are never greater than the sum
This is the heart of the one, who stands before an open door and bids us, COME!
All the times when I had failed to recognize how many chairs where gathered there around the feast
To break the bread, and break these boundaries that kept us from our only common ground, THE invitation to SIT DOWN! If we will come!!!
There is room enough for all of us!
Please come!
And the arms are open wide enough!!!
Please come!
ANd the parts are never greater than the sum
this is the heart of the one who stands before and open door and bids us COME!!
From the best of humanity
From the depths of the gravity
come now and see how we need every different being on this same straight
COME!! there is room enough for all of us!!
Please come!! The arms are open wide enough!!
Please come! the parts are never greater than the sum.
This is the heart of the one who stands before and open door and bids us come!!!!!!
I LOVE this song so much. To me this is the essence of the Gospel. The invitation he has given to all of us to rest in his peace. To dine at the table with him.
He loves us all.
Traditionalist, Feminist, Gay, Straight. White, Black, Male, Female!! We are all invited I think in people haste to get to the party they forget that everyone eles's presence is just as important as ours!!!
I can only address this from the notion of common humanity. Where we all ask if not the precise Q, we ask something in that region.
We are all on a quest and out gift of awareness is very much a double edged sword. But as long as we view things in a good way and don't get ourselves caught in circular arguments/thoughts we eventually calm down and things get a bit clearer.
You relative to your age cohort have an advantage. You have a kid and are in a stable relationship. These by themselves will cause a fake it 'til you make it onto you. You simply cannot through a hissyfit and expect a two year old to give much of a hoot. And while individually you and your partner may be volcanic in temperament, the very thin tether marked on your annular finger denotes a joint design where you are the main actors. So you may have a atomic detonations of arguments and you may flounce off and drive for an hour in a haze of temper. Nevertheless were you not connected you'd keep driving.
Anywoo's, just make sure you are the star in the play that's you own life. And never allow even your kids or anyone else to usurp you. I think it was Eleanor Roosevelt said 'you allow yourself to be enslaved'. Something in that form anyway.
I found this http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=84u5k4bboU4 I strongly suspect the four are staunch feminists somehow.
There is something odd with the way you have the comment section configured. I cannot get it to mail follow-on's unless I have already commented.
Hi Lady!
I just saw I'm on your bloglist. This makes me really, really happy inside.
Also, I love your blog. I don't agree on all levels or all points, but I enjoy it.
I also don't agree with A LOT that Joanna Brooks has to say. That being said, I'm really glad you enjoyed her book.
I'm so glad you care about this stuff.
I recently re-read an awesome talk about the difference between the Gospel and the Church. The Church is important, but (as I think you already know) it's a means to an end. The Gospel is what matters. Sometimes the church is a bunch of manna-eating nomads with a travelling tabernacle (Exodus), sometimes it's "Gathering in Utah-Zion" (Brigham Young's time), and sometimes the Church is like it is today. In all 3 cases, the church has very different policies and some different laws (others, obviously, don't change).
The beautiful part is that while the Church changes, the Gospel, the Savior, and the Atonement are the same. The Eternal remains the same. It's that part that's important, I think.
(Talk) http://www.lds.org/general-conference/2012/04/converted-to-his-gospel-through-his-church?lang=eng
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