Let's Talk Birthing Choices

So....  the I tried the super medical approach-  you know, the explore-everything-that-could-ever-possibly-go-wrong route.  I went to the Medical University (MU).

1. They mixed up my medical records with another lady who was 5 months further* along than me.  When I told them this fact, they argued with me until I insisted on giving them my social security number.
2. The MU insisted that I have an internal ultrasound at 8 weeks.  When the doctor performed said ultrasound, she placed the transducer in the wrong place.  Only after I told her she was in the wrong neighborhood did she remove the transducer and start searching for the right neighborhood.  No explanation.  No apology.
3. Once my clothes were back on, they told me I needed a pelvic exam.
4. When I spoke with the OBGYN, he gave me the following information:
   a)  Although I am in a fully monogamous marriage and have been for years, I had to have $1000 bloodwork done to test for HIV, syphilis, and Hepatitis B.
   b)  I would need a new and different test every visit to determine any and everything that could be wrong with my baby.
   c)  At 20 weeks I would need another internal ultrasound to take a comprehensive look at each of my baby's organs to make sure they were properly forming and functioning.
   d)  Finally, we discussed my desired for a VBAC.  The doctor very cavalierly said that he would hope for a VBAC if that is what I wanted, but when the time came, I would end up having a Cesarean because that is what would be best for me and the baby since I had a Cesarean under my belt (no pun intended) already.  
5. When I inquired about all the tests, the OBGYN told me that they are very thorough with their patients.  Apparently the MU treats all high risk cases the same.  However, all high risk cases are not the same.  I asked specifically about the test for Down Syndrome.  "I'm not even 30...  am I really at risk?"  To which the OBGYN said that he thought everyone should have the test.  I am a minimally invasive, hands off kind of gal.  Constant, expensive, unnecessary testing sounds scary, uncomfortable, and like something to which neither my baby or I need to be subjected. 

I came home in tears.  I was no longer excited to be pregnant.  Sure, I was still excited to be adding a new child to our family, but I was horrified and terrified at the road ahead of me.  Over dinner I poured out my feelings to Jason and told him that I never wanted to be pregnant again.  Sure I am the pregnant one, but somehow, all of the decision-making was left to other people.  He looked me straight in the eye and said, "Blythe, clearly this is not our best option."  We called the birthing center the very next day to ask if there was any chance they could do my prenatal care again.  Turns out, the answer was yes, but I would need to deliver at the local hospital.  I made an appointment and the midwives three weeks later.  We discussed how I was feeling and how I could listen to my body.  I love that at the birthing center, the biggest (though of course not the only) indicator of my pregnancy health is what my body is telling me.  

When I came home from the birthing center, I was energetic and excited.  I was ready to be pregnant.  I didn't have anxiety from the idea that people were going to poking and prodding me for nine months with no reverence for the fact that I am a person, not merely and incubator.  

Women's birthing options are disappearing.  We are hardly given information on our options as is, but now our options are simply disappearing.  I think my favorite remark I have received after revealing that I prefer birthing centers over hospitals is, "Well, you're taking a huge risk.  You're putting your baby at risk."  To that person I say, if you were more educated about all of a woman's birthing options, you would understand that everything birthing situation comes with its share of risk, and, Honey, it's not your fault for not knowing that.  We, as a society, should be much more proactive about informing pregnant couples (and people just wanting information) about women's birthing options.  There are many.

1. Home Birth: This allows a woman to give birth in the privacy of her home.  Most women who decide on a home birth prefer their own space.  In her own space, smells, lighting, temperatures, etc. are controllable and predictable.  Mammals are designed to birth in environments that are quiet, low lighting, and private.  Did you know that a dog will actually take herself out of labor if her environment isn't quiet and private enough?  This is probably why home births generally lead to more natural, fewer complication births.  However, home birth means at home, and I don't know about you, but I don't have an OR in case of emergencies located in my house.  Home birth carries a risk of not getting to a hospital in time.  Also, currently (I did some research, but would love to be corrected on this), it is not illegal to give birth in your home in ANY state, but it IS illegal in some states to have someone besides an OBGYN do a medical procedure.  For example:  It is legal to push a baby out in your home, but it may be illegal to have a midwife check how dilated you are.
2. Birthing Center:  This is the medium between home birth and the hospital.  It's a medical environment that is designed to be as homey and hands-off as can be unless otherwise necessary.  Often these establishments have hospital affiliates for situations that arise that may need medical attention beyond the scope of a midwife.  Birthing centers focus on natural birth, offering options such as waterbirths, birthing balls, and birth stools for pain management.  Birthing without medication has proven to lower rates of cesarean.  Again, you are not at a hospital, so there is no surgical equipment or pain medication should you decide birth is overwhelming.  At a birthing that is more hands-off, if you want certain tests done (like genetic screening), you will need to speak up.  They will not just casually do it.
3. Hospital:  Medical intervention at its finest.  Hospitals save lives.  They are equipped with the highest level of education doctors and the tools to help get that baby out in any situation.  That have medication, nurseries, OBGYNS, neonatal specialists.  Hospitals tend to take the reins out of the mother's hands, and that makes some women more comfortable when giving birth.  In hospitals, Doctors deliver babies, whereas midwives "catch" the baby you delivered.  Hospitals also have about a 1 in 4 Cesarean Section rate, whether needed or not.
4. Obstetrician:  Delivers at the hospital.  An OB is the most educated person to bring your baby into this world.  However, OBs like to be in charge.  They will make decisions for you.  They will put pressure to do things her/his way.
5. Family Practitioner:  Generally delivers in hospital.  Good for low risk pregnancies.
6. Midwife:  Midwives can have a wide spectrum of training. Certified nurse-midwives have a nursing degree and additional training in midwifery. Direct-entry midwives or certified professional midwives have extensive training in midwifery even though they do not have a nursing degree. Most midwives offer care that is flexible and individualized with little medical intervention. Because of limited formal training, they usually limit their care to low risk pregnancies. Many midwives offer deliveries in homes, birthing centers, or hospitals.**
7. Unassisted:  is just that:  unassisted.  Check out this blog on why this mother chose unassisted child birth.
8. Natural:  No medication.  It works on your body's natural production of Oxytocin rather that the synthetic Pitocin.  No epidural.  Natural birth only uses what mother nature thought was requisite.  
9. Vaginal:  This can be with or without pain medication.  Maybe part one way, part another.  This can be done EVEN IF you have already had a Cesarean.
10. Cesarean:  Surgery to get your baby out performed in an operating room.  Sometimes it is an emergency, sometimes it is planned.  This can limit your number of children.  

And you know what?  I don't care what you choose.  I know that for me, for my family, a birthing center prenatal care and a hospital delivery with midwives catching my baby is best.  If it's not for you, that is perfectly okay.  And do not let anyone make you feel uncomfortable about it.  As a mother and as a couple, that is yours to decide.  

*Okay, Grammar Police, I consulted my personal Grammar Police and was advised that either could be considered correct. We could be saying "farther" because we can measure a pregnancy as having 40 weeks in it, and therefore could be discussing a measurable amount of time.  However, we decided that "further" would be more correct since most pregnancies do not actually measure 40 weeks (either going over or under).  Feel free to leave your opinion.  

**Explanation taken from americanpregnancy.org

First Trimester Balance and Hunger

I do not understand why humans got away from eating whole grains.  Why is it so freaking hard, not to mention expensive, to find whole grain options in food.  Why is the default white flour?

One of the most frustrating things I have encountered is a lack of options.  I still want good food, I just wanted it to be real food.  You know, stuff my body knows how to digest.  For some reason, this pregnancy has decided to make me way sicker than last time (at least in my recollection).  It seems like this time, and remember that I am only 8 weeks at this point, I am either STARVING, exhausted, absolutely nauseous, or some combination of the three.

Taken from zazzle.com
(yes! you can buy this shirt!)

Also, cravings?  Yeah.  I read a while back that simply because you have a particular craving when you're pregnant does not mean you should give in to it.   Sometimes what's best for your body and baby is not that crazy Twizzler/pickle combo your brain is dreaming up.  With that said, many times when I am feeling sick, it seems the only thing that would make me feel better is that carbo-licious biscuit smothered in butter and syrup (not real maple syrup-  Mrs. Butterworth's terrible for but oh-so-stinkin-good syrup).  What am I to do?  Well, I have figured out that if I don't let myself get to the point of being really hungry, the cravings keep themselves more in check.  It's the total opposite of how my un-pregnant eating habits should be, which is do not shove food in your mouth if you are not hungry.  Now, in order to control what is going into my body and my crazy hunger, I have eat a small snack before I am hungry.*

Also, this week I decided to cut myself some slack because, whoa, those reins were tight.  Four weeks ago when I began this adventure, I knew I would start out strict and find balance as I journeyed on.  With the exception of one weekly aberration, I have abstained from bread of any sort, refined sugar or any real amount of organic sugar, white pastas, corn, and basically anything that isn't amazing for my body.  Call me weak, but some concessions have to be made.  So.  Here is my compromise with myself:  I am still steering clear of as much refined sugar and corn as possible because those are biggies.  However, I went to Whole Foods yesterday** and picked up snacks.  Yes, snacks, those creatures that un-pregnant people give such a bad rap.  But remember, snacks make good choices later way more feasible.

Taken from someecards.com

Having food on hand that doesn't need much preparation means better choices because cravings aren't taking over and fewer apologies to the husband for things that come spewing out of my mouth.  I picked up some basics like brown rice cakes and Brazil nuts, but then I got to the bakery and found bread.  I had already decided that I was going to stop shunning bread, so my heart did a leap as I pulled my buggy (that's a shopping cart to all ya'll out of the south) and asked for this amazing black pepper and Parmesan bread.  The great thing (okay, some of the great things) about the Whole Foods bakery is that they list the wholesome ingredients and that list is short rather than the length of my arm.  Then, I got a second loaf of bread.  Since my black pepper and Parmesan bread was to accent dinners, I also picked up the most whole grain, kernel-ed bread I could find to make peanut butter and jelly sandwiches.

But, enough of this food talk, it is really time for a nap.

*Some small snacks are a green salad, a couple Brazil nuts, almonds, a banana, whole grain bread with some cold-pressed olive oil-  you get the picture.

**I used to be a strictly Earth Fare gal, but corporate wins this round.  Whole Foods is so much bigger and has everything I need in multiple options including fair trade! :)

I got a fever... and the only prescription... is more cowbell.

Or more protein, as the case may be.  Yes, protein is even more essential than normal for a preggo diet, and even harder for me to come by since I'm a pescetarian who can only have seafood two days a week.

So what's a gal to do?  Well, for me, it omelets, omelets, and more omelets.  Not only does this help with protein, it gives me a chance to throw in some liver super foods like onions, garlic, and spinach and other vegetables.  They never get boring because I can always swap up the ingredients.  Some people warn against eating too many eggs because of the cholesterol, but when you are a vegetarian, barring any genetic contribution, cholesterol is not something you have to worry about much.  If cholesterol is something that you need to be concerned with, exclude the yolks and make egg white omelets!

Where do you get your protein??

This was my first omelet....I missed the shape a bit, and I forgot to shred the cheese before hand.  It made not be very pretty, but let me tell you, it really hit the spot.

 This is the same as the omelet above, but I made it prettier.  I sauteed garlic, onions, and red peppers in some Earth Balance Vegan Butter and add some thyme.  Then I add to a two egg omelet and sprinkle with mozzarella cheese.  Yum!

This omelet has mushrooms swapped out for the red peppers.  So yummy, but I should have added some fresh diced tomatoes on top.  I think the more color the better, personally.